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Yeah, so it's been so long since I wrote that there is no longer anything on the front page. I thought I'd better fix that. Which means you guys get to hear all about my morning.

--So I'm going to Ottawa this weekend with Thom and Jehan. I'm super excited. Let me show you how excited I am:

This is how excited King Midas was when he got the ability to turn stuff into gold:
X X X X X

This is how excited italian mapmaker Amerigo Verspucci was when he found out they were going to name one two continents after him:
X X X X X X

(yeah and don't ask me how I remember that, I certainly don't remember anything else about the founding discovery re-re-re-discovery of the new world)

This is how angry Christopher Columbus knowing that the only places named after him are some crappy city in ohio, some drug-ridden federal district, some drug-ridden south american country and some pot-head inhabited canadian province, the sucka:
X X X X X X X

This is how excited I am:
X X X X X X X X X X

--So today i had to get up at 7:30 to take the car to the dealer to get it checked up and stuff. When i woke up it was raining, which is not a good sign for my day. Especially 'cuz I left my car windows down. This is me hoping the rain doesn't go to Ottawa this weekend. But all things considered, it probably will. Being a calvinist, I don't believe in luck, so it's no surprise that luck doesn't believe in me.

-- I got home from the car shop and my grandma asked (and I just typed aksed there, shudder) if i'd told the guy to rotate the tires. she's told me to have him do this about a dozen times over the last week but I forgot. So I called them.

Me: (dials)

Him: (picks up) "Seth speaking... is this Tim?"

Me: Uh, yeah. (to self) eee he's scary. magic. how'd he know it was me. cower.

Me: Yeah I need to have my tires rotated too, can you do that?

Him: Yeah.

Me: OK, bye. (hangs up quickly)

So I'm thinking either the guy has caller id and the amazing ability to connect a phone number with its corresponding human, or he and his co-workers take bets on which customer is going to psychotically call to check on his car every ten minutes. In which case, I'm gratified to know he bet on me. I guess.

-- The cats are out of food now. Which means that every time I go into the basement, fat cat (our cats' names are Mystery and Mischief but we call them 'fat cat' and 'brat cat' respectively) runs down the stairs ahead of me and yowls at his food bowl. Stupid cat, you are so fat that you could live for months off your blubber. You are the size of a medium dog. I will get you food when I go get my car later today, I bet you will make it to this afternoon without croaking. Billions of kittens are starving in south asia you know. (inside joke alert: jehan and I have complained that millions of parents across north america have told their children to eat green stuff because of the starving children in Africa. we think south asia deserves pity too.)

--i've noticed that i have an increasing allergy to using capital letters when i'm writing online or informally. even more disturbing, i recently read a comment somewhere that was in all lower case (several paragraphs long), but i didn't even notice until the writer apologized for it at the end of the note. that's a bit scary considering i'm a pedant of the first order, armed with the proper usage of 'who/whom' and 'lie/lay' and all the other english language shibboleths. on the other hand, the romans built a world-class empire with all caps, so i don't see how we'll do too badly with lower case, which is easier to read according to something i read on the internet a while back. and the romans didn't even have 'u'. imagine how lasting our civilization will be with this knowledge of five vowel characters representing 12 vowel sounds. yay america and associated nations.

-- mornings are clearly not good times for me. i caught myself yelling at the toaster oven. the lever that was going to make it cook my waffles was not going down. i was angry. very, very angry.

--simon, if you're still reading this blog, i want you to estimate my weight based on this blog entry.

-- the best part is, i get to wake up an hour and a half earlier tomorrow to leave for ontario. that's right, six am. that's at least five hours earlier than usual. i'm going to try not to take any naps today and to go to bed at ten. which is an hour and a half earlier than my grandma goes to bed. sigh.

Posted by Tim at June 10, 2004 09:23 AM | TrackBack