I wrote this this morning. I was surprised at how easily it came, given that I've barely written any poetry since I came to Canada, and the few things I've done are mostly crappy. I like this one without having edited it, which is rare for me, a perfectionistic writer and poet.
Song of WinterUpdateSome commenter wanted a rhyming poem, and I thought that was a good idea -- quite happy with the results:the way the snow falls sometimes
slowly, slifting, like leaves sinking in
water and bobbing: this I loveand I love, too, the winter's breath
which is cold and angry but bears
a grudging admiration for us fewwho, living in these northern lands
of dark days and short summers,
do not flee to Florida, the sunny southbut stay to learn under the tutelage
of our frozen goddess; she shelters
us and smiles coldly upon us.
the way sometimes the snow is fallingThe 'scorn and crave' phrase, you may note, is stolen from a hymn whose name I can't remember but which has the plaintive, lovely tune of "Let all mortal flesh keep silence". Redeemer people can probably help me out here; the line is "You [Christ] whom we both scorn and crave". I do like the poem better now, I think. Maybe I'll try to "rhymeize" more of my free-verse poetry.
slowly, slipping, like leaves in water;
this I love, their sinking, bobbingand, too, I love the breaths of winter
so cold and angry, but which bear
a sullen admiration, almost wonderat we few who, burdened with cold cares,
don't flee to Florida, the sunny south
but stay to learn and live, to love these fairnorth-lands, these places which for months
are white and barren, glistening
while we both scorn and crave the warmth.
You read the Onion, too?! Tim, we have to hang out more. First Toothpaste for Dinner, then the Monster at the End of the Book, then Homestar Runner, and now The Onion! That's it, you're my new favorite Redeemer boy.
Posted by: Allison at February 11, 2004 10:55 PMoh goody! maybe I'll put that at the top of my blog.
Posted by: Tim the Michigander at February 11, 2004 11:05 PMoops i do not have the technical ability to do what i'm trying to. rest assured, i used what meagre html capabilities i had. also i do not know why i am not using capital letters right now.
Posted by: Tim the Michigander at February 11, 2004 11:11 PMYou could just write a post saying that you are someone's favorite boy at Redeemer. That'd work.
Posted by: Allison at February 12, 2004 12:35 AMor people could just read this.
Posted by: Tim the Michigander at February 12, 2004 02:33 AMBUT WHAT IF THEY DON'T?!? The horror!
Posted by: Allison at February 12, 2004 03:15 AMI feel like I've hacked into a private I.M. chat.
;)
I like the poem, Tim. NOW MAKE IT RHYME!
Posted by: Tuning Spork at February 13, 2004 09:22 PMOh, you're one of those poems-should-rhyme critics. Let's see:
the way sometimes the snow is falling
slowly, slipping, like leaves in water;
this I love, their sinking, bobbing
and, too, I love the breaths of winter
so cold and angry, but which bear
a sullen admiration, almost wonder
at we few who, burdened with cold cares,
don't flee to Florida, the sunny south
but stay to learn and live, to love these fair
north-lands, these places which for months
are white and barren, glistening
while we both scorn and crave the warmth.
The rhymes aren't perfect (south/months/warmth) but there you go. I think I like this one even better.
Posted by: Tim at February 14, 2004 01:57 PMMe likey. Great job!
Posted by: Tuning Spork at February 14, 2004 08:24 PMWhat's Crackin! - Just need to go Play Bingo - for my Online Bingo Habit! But I cannot Find a Good Bingo Online website to cover my bingo addiction!
Posted by: Bingo at October 25, 2004 03:42 AM